Onions, Garlic, Cabbage, Kraut. There are some foods that should only be consumed when one is alone.
If you’re going to be smelly, either through your mouth, pores, or hind end, those around you would appreciate it if you did that when you had some alone time.
Sure true love is all about unconditional love, and taking the good with the bad. But asking someone to subject themselves to your resulting odor because you had a hankering for New England clam chowder, even though you’re lactose intolerant is selfish.
Bella Farps
My basset hound has a nasty habit of eating dog crap. She’s almost 10 years old and yes, we tried, unsuccessfully, multiple tactics to get her to stop. That’s just what she does. Interestingly, she rarely farts.
Instead, somehow her mouth and her butt seem to be mixed up, so when this adorable hound dog burps, you seriously need to duck and cover, and do it quickly. The cloud of stink is wafting your way, post haste. We call the burp/fart combo a Farp.
Butt she can’t seem to help it. It’s not so much a choice for her, it’s a necessity. And, she is a dog.
People Have Choices
News Flash: I don’t care how long you’ve known someone or how intimate you are, no one wants to smell your nasty breath, day old stink oozing out your pores, god awful gas, or foot stench that could peel paint off a Prius.
If it happens, it happens. But there is absolutely no reason to intentionally inflict that eye watering, nose curling offense on someone. Please be courteous. If you are going to be around others hours after you ingest something that may not agree with you, perhaps opt for a different menu selection.
Look into digestive enzymes, anti-gas OTC remedies, toothpaste, and mouthwash. I’m not saying don’t enjoy your favorite smelly foods. Just think, before you stink.
Laurie Laughlin: Funny Motivational Humorist Speaker
Laurie Laughlin, is a Funny Motivational Speaker who lost her parents and her home at a young age, lost a job that she truly enjoyed, lost her health, her entire life savings, and she even lost the ability to trust and to feel safe. But the one thing she never lost is her sense of humor.
With a degree in Homeland Security, background in lie detecting, direct sales, and stand up comedy, she now enjoys her days as a corporate keynote speaker.
In her most requested program about resilience, Laurie shows audiences how they can use laughter to push through difficult times to keep going despite setbacks and challenges.
Laurie loves her basset hounds, strong coffee, crossword puzzles, and witty banter.
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