Think Before You Stink

Onions, Garlic, Cabbage, Kraut. There are some foods that should only be consumed when one is alone.

If you’re going to be smelly, either through your mouth, pores, or hind end, those around you would appreciate it if you did that when you had some alone time.

Sure true love is all about unconditional love, and taking the good with the bad. But asking someone to subject themselves to your resulting odor because you had a hankering for New England clam chowder, even though you’re lactose intolerant is selfish.

Bella Farps

My basset hound has a nasty habit of eating dog crap. She’s almost 10 years old and yes, we tried, unsuccessfully, multiple tactics to get her to stop. That’s just what she does. Interestingly, she rarely farts.

Instead, somehow her mouth and her butt seem to be mixed up, so when this adorable hound dog burps, you seriously need to duck and cover, and do it quickly. The cloud of stink is wafting your way, post haste.  We call the burp/fart combo a Farp.

Butt she can’t seem to help it. It’s not so much a choice for her, it’s a necessity. And, she is a dog.

People Have Choices

News Flash: I don’t care how long you’ve known someone or how intimate you are, no one wants to smell your nasty breath, day old stink oozing out your pores, god awful gas, or foot stench that could peel paint off a Prius.

If it happens, it happens. But there is absolutely no reason to intentionally inflict that eye watering, nose curling offense on someone. Please be courteous. If you are going to be around others hours after you ingest something that may not agree with you, perhaps opt for a different menu selection.

Look into digestive enzymes, anti-gas OTC remedies, toothpaste, and mouthwash. I’m not saying don’t enjoy your favorite smelly foods. Just think, before you stink.